Getting Peace Out Of An Angry Teen Situation.
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Never underestimate the power of a soft answer to calm down tense, hostile angry teens. The soft answer will get rid of anger.
The antics of an angry teen, even when not intentional have the ability to upset the last remainders of any peace that is present right now between you. But you have to be patient and wise and remember a huge part of the problem is that many, probably the majority of the angry teen population do not know what to do about their anger.
There is one thing that teens agree on though and as a parent or an adult, I bet that you can't tell me what in a teenagers' mind is the biggest problem that makes them angry! If you knew what it was then you would then you would know the one place where you need to a lot of your effort. And the reality is if the shoe were on the other foot; if your teen were doing it to you, you would be angry too.
Before I tell you what this one problem is, we will talk a bit about three important ideas behind parenting an angry teen, living with one, and being one.
As the parent of an angry teen, you want to make sure that you love and respect him. It is also better if you show this love and respect rather than tell him that it is there. If you just do these two things, the teenager you are thinking about will recognize this about you, and even though changes might not happen right away, you can expect that changes will come.
Many parents whose teens turn out alright say that this is the key to winning them.
Showing your love and respect means that you are going to run the risk of having your feelings hurt. But at the end of the day things will work in your favor.
It is also important that you know that in the homes where the angry teen puts away his anger, the biggest driver for success was when the parents or home leaders actually took the lead and were consistent in their love and respect, they were resilient and never gave up during the process that they were working out in the young person they were caring for.
While you show love and respect, it is also important that you command love and respect. This means that you will not be taking foolishness from your teen. In order for the respect you give to mean something to someone, you must be respected yourself.
This means that you will have to be careful not to argue with him as if he were your equal. If you ever lose your calm and begin to shout, you will make your situation worse than it is. So when things heat up, you need to always be relaxed, and act as if you know what to do, even when you don't. And the truth is that you can learn what needs to be done so that like thousands who never thought they could, you too can control the anger around you.
It is important that you yourself learn how to control and manage anger so that you can lead the way in helping your angry teen make the changes that needs to be made in his attitude and behavior.
Living with an angry teen.
I said it before, but did you know that you can get rid of anger by giving a soft answer.
Now the temptation will be to answer an angry person by showing them your anger as well. If you take this approach, you will eventually end up angry like the person who is bothering you, and the next thing you know you are an agitative aggressor as well.
To give you a few tips, I would say to you, that you should secure your property all of the time. You want to take away opportunities for the angry one to do things to get on your nerves.
Next, you will want to avoid your angry teen whenever you have to. I would also tell you to be strong and know that the world is not fair, and you just want to do what is best for both you and your angry partner.
However, you must never support him in his angry actions. When he is wrong, make sure that he knows that you are not cool with what he does, but as far as he goes, you like him still.
Being an angry teen
If you are the angry one, know that uncontrolled anger does not produce anything good.
When you are an angry teen and you do something wrong because of your anger, you are not excused and you are still responsible for what has taken place.
You should also know that some wrongs are corrected when an apology is given, and whenever you commit a wrong to someone an apology is always in order. But you should also know that in many situations an apology is nowhere near enough to fix what is wrong. This is why you must be careful about what you do when you are mad.
It is understood that in your world it is predominantly felt that the biggest problems you have with adults is that they do not really listen to what you have to say. In some cases this is true, and hopefully those who read this will be able to make satisfactory changes, but even if they don't you still have to take care of yourself.
Know that it might seem like impossibility, but you too can learn to control your anger.
It will help you to understand what they teach in anger management classes, and you will want to make sure that you are dealing with your anger correctly so that it does not turn into rage.
But to give you a tip, I would say to you, start to take notes about or at least remember what it is that you think makes you upset. With this information, you can start to avoid the situations that anger you.
You will also want to make sure that you take some time alone everyday to think about good things and to relax yourself emotionally. You will discipline yourself to think nothing but good thoughts for at least half an hour to an hour every day.
You have to control your anger. Many hardships await you if you don't.
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